Comparisions
by SomewhereBeyondReality
Summary: "Maybe their freaky connection stretched too far because now – looking back – she can see parallels between Rory's relationships and her own."  Lorelai reflects on the men in the Gilmore girls pasts. Lit & JJ!  Fourth in 'The World of Rory's Head series.


**Originally I was going to do this from Rory's perspective like the previous stories but decided it would actually be more interesting from Lorelai's POV, just see her view of Jess and how it changed. (It always bugged me so much that the writers never showed Lorelai's reaction to Jess convincing Rory to go back to Yale – he deserved the acknowledgment). And of course that meant I could throw in some JavaJunkie and who doesn't love that?**

**Anyway...onwards!**

**X-X**

Mostly Lorelai's proud of her daughter's inheritance. Rory has her motor mouth, her iron stomach, her caffeine addiction, her eyes and a hundred other things she can't remember right now.

However she wishes Rory _hadn't _inherited her luck with men. Lorelai knows that – romantically – she wasn't the best role model.

Maybe their freaky connection stretched_ too_ far because now – looking back – she can see parallels between Rory's relationships and her own.

_Dean. _Perhaps it was because Rory dated him at the same time Lorelai dated Max – but the two men were similar (in some ways at least).

They were kind and sweet and dependable: always there when needed – a steadying influence – a rock to cling to: _Safe._

Admittedly Max was more intelligent. (As much as Lorelai loved Dean he wasn't particularly bright. Not stupid, but you had to be more than 'not stupid' to keep up).

But brains aside they were both 'gentlemen'. Stars Hollow loved them, Rory and Lorelai loved them; they were so..._loveable. _They fitted with the crazy town: Prince Charmings for the Town Princesses.

But of course the biggest parallel is that they were both treated like crap by their Gilmore girls.

Lorelai considers what's worse: Pulling out a week before your wedding or cheating on your steady boyfriend. (Admittedly Rory only kissed Jess once but emotionally she was over Dean long before the Dance Marathon).

But the point is both of them ditched their Princes for no valid reason.

That's the worst thing because neither Max nor Dean _did _anything wrong – they were perfect, but Gilmore's obviously don't want perfection.

(Of course Max and Dean reacted differently to rejection: she's glad Max didn't stoop to marrying a woman on rebound and then cheating on her – he's too good for that. But while in a Gilmore relationship both men were pretty flawless.)

She wonders if she and Rory are too screwed up to deal with commitment, that they automatically run away from comfort and security and gentlemen who speak in multiple syllables.

_Logan. _Lorelai's seen Chris in all of Rory's boyfriends but Logan could be a clone of him.

No wonder she disliked him: she on guard for the LoganandChris type. _She'd _succumbed to it but wanted to keep Rory away from her own mistakes.

But she'd failed: Logan's charm and wit had drawn Rory in like Chris had attracted Lorelai. He'd been exciting and spontaneous and different and Rory (despite being the 'sensible' Gilmore) had fallen just as hard as her Mom.

To be fair Logan had got together quicker than Chris: there'd been bumps, but he'd settled down and tried to make it work.

The idea of their marriage had still horrified Lorelai but thankfully Rory _had _learnt something from her, even if it was only witnessing her failed marriage with Chris – and refused.

At that memory, Lorelai thinks of the few times she and Rory described their relationships with Logan and Chris.

"_You're the man I want to want."_

"_I can't help it, I love him." _(Rory hadn't said that to her originally, but she's relayed the conversation).

On the surface the two statements looked completely different but the subtext was the same:

She and Rory loved their two playboys despite the undependability; wanted to spend the rest of their lives with them, grow old together but love wasn't_ enough. _It wasn't enough to have fun and laugh, there needed to be something more – and with Logan and Chris there was _something _missing.

It just was never _right._

She's been in denial about the final comparison it for years. She's closed her eyes, refused to see him for reasons that pile onto each other, forming the twisted web of her thoughts.

_Jess Mariano. _

For a long time Lorelai tried to convince herself that he was nothing. He didn't compare to _anyone _except maybe her early boyfriends who were hormones products.

After all, Dean was Rory's first boyfriend, her first kiss, her first...sexual experience. _(Ugh). _Logan was the first boy she moved in with, the first boy who proposed.

But Jess? What did he have to claim? Her first screw up?

Rory should have got over him and the 'bad boy' phase quickly

But then Rory _didn't _get over him and Jess continued to come back to her time and time again, so Lorelai feared a different parallel. It seemed Jess was Rory's Chris – a flighty high school boyfriend that never let go.

Now of course she knows how wrong she'd been. With Logan as Chris, that left Jess as...

_Luke. _

Two gruff, monosyllabic cynics; with Emily-Disapproved badges, rough exteriors, and a habit of pining endlessly for Gilmore Girls. (The comparison is inescapable but she'd tried so hard to run from it anyway).

Jess and Luke are different in some ways of course: Jess has a roaming edge that the steady Luke will never have but Lorelai knows she and Rory have different needs. Rory needs someone who will loosen her and Lorelai...she needs someone to ground her.

She supposes that Jess and Luke are the perverse reversal of that.

It wasn't until she (_finally_) accepted that Luke was 'The One' and got him to the altar that she truly _saw _Rory and Jess.

As she'd watched them dance at her town gazebo wedding she realized that if Jess and Luke had anything in common it was their ability to _wait._

Through Rory and Lorelai's various relationships: as a steady presence or an unexpected invader, as a friend or an ex – they'd just been _there. _

And now, as Lorelai watches her eldest daughter make her way up the bridge aisle she smiles. Because Jess will have so many firsts (and hopefully only's): Rory first husband, the first father of her children, the first to grow old with her and the first man she ever _truly _gave her heart to.

Because in the end – only two men could ever tie a Gilmore girl down.

X-X

Not that happy with this one but I wanted to get it down. People have been very kind in donating reviews so please keep it up!


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